My first thought was to ignore him and leave because children always seem to forgive and forget these types of things fairly quickly. His protests intensified to screams, however, until I finally relented and gave him back the water bottle. I made sure he could see my disappointment. I thought it important to make him aware that it is no small thing to promise something and not deliver. I thought he should feel the consequences of offering something (although he never offered) and then stingily insisting that it be given back. I never said a word, but once he felt my disappointment (kids can be uncanny about these things) he tried to give the bottle back. I wouldn’t take it. I wanted him to learn that choices have consequences and that ‘do-overs’ in life are not promised. My wife even piled on and told Joshua that if he is not willing to share his things then other people will not be willing to share with him. The realization of what that meant: not getting some of Dad’s potato chips, not sipping some of Mom’s soda, not playing with his friend Malik’s video game riled him up even more. He tearfully pleaded, ‘Please take it back daddy! You can have the water! Please take it back!’ I said no and walked out the door. I was satisfied that he would remember this lesson, besides this had already taken more time than I had to give.
I was halfway to the church when I got a call on my cell phone. It rings with a custom recording of my son’s voice saying ‘Hello…I love you papa.’ I couldn’t hear it over the gospel music playing in my car; I just felt it vibrating on my hip. I answered to my wife calling to say that Joshua was very distraught about not giving me the water bottle. He was crying in the background and I heard the desperation in his voice. I asked my wife to put him on the phone and instead of waiting to be prompted to say something on the phone, like he normally does, he instantly blurted out, ‘I’m sorry’. I immediately told him that everything was okay; that it was no big deal. He said ‘Okay’ in a way that made me feel like he was burying his head deep into my chest like he used to when he was content to let me hold him for long stretches of time. I was grateful for the opportunity to give him grace. I pray that the next time I will give it to him sooner.
